03.30.15

The better part of this morning has been spent goose-spotting through the back window. Behind our house is a huge farmer's field, and since it's cloudy and cold out we're indoors again today. But Oliver has been diligently watching the field, looking for our new arrivals. It's hard to spot them when they're in the field, since their colours match, but once they step on the snow they stick out like a sore thumb, and Oliver starts "flapping his wings" and shouting "It's a geese! It's a geese!"

It's a dreary day, weather wise, but attitude wise it couldn't be better. Yesterday was a very painful day, as it's the most excruciating part of my cycle. And I have a better handle on what may be going on with me. We're all basically 99% sure it's ovarian cysts. And I couldn't be more excited, because I finally got the call today for my ultrasound to determine for sure that it is indeed that. This is excellent news. This is excellent excellent news. Cysts are very manageable, very common (they say almost every woman will have at least one in their lives) and shouldn't affect any future family planning we want to do, if we decide we want to. In any dramatic way, anyway. I have my fingers crossed that this is in fact what's going on, that it's minor and treatable, and I can get on with my life. My spirits are very high today. I'm practically humming around the house. The appointment will be this afternoon, and the follow-up appointment with my physician will be next week Wednesday (due to the Easter weekend coming up, and him being out of the office.) Answers are coming, people!

Aside from excruciating cramps over the weekend, and some strange digestive issues having to do with what I can only describe as food poisoning (dairy? refined sugar, maybe?) it was actually a very relaxing weekend. We didn't even go out anywhere. Just stayed in all together and relaxed - me with my hot water bottle handy. Matt and I binge watched some Downton Abbey, and he's actually as into it as I am (or a very good liar!) It's an incredible moment, to be able to look back at the facts of the weekend, and know that it was fraught with negativity and pain, and yet have an attitude so positive that I can reflect on the sparkling moments sprinkled throughout.

I have to grasp this moment and these feelings as tightly as I can, stretch this out as long as it can be stretched, and soak it in until my very core is saturated. It's hard to know when moments like these will come, and how long they will last, so allowing them to linger is key. It's a good day.