New Beginnings

And it couldn't have come at a better time. I am in desperate need of a new beginning.

I've realized that I've got to grab a hold of my life, and steer it in the direction I want it to go, as opposed to the other way around. Sometimes I feel like I'm Britney Spears' baby, just sittin' there behind the wheel, clueless as to how I got there. And am I steering? Hardly.

Let's face it. Us moms are in the middle of an inadequacy storm. Even without the constant competition between each other, one afternoon spent on Pinterest is enough to make you want to curl up in a ball and weep. Does my child sleep in a custom bunk bed room? No. Do I make home-made healthy meals from scratch three times a day, in fancy little bentos, every day? No. Do I sew all of his clothes, and have daily craft time? And use cloth diapers, and never ever EVER let him watch television? Absolutely not. We're all kind of making it up as we go, aren't we? I'd like to think that one day I'll have time to do a thing or two that I've pinned onto my Pinterest board, but for now, I'm just going to have to be okay with doin' my best. That has to be sufficient right now.

So I guess it's goal time! All of you women have been here, don't you deny it! I don't want to see no moms shaking their heads, or sticking up their noses. It's time to make a list of goals that probably will not be accomplished, because they are far too outrageously different than the norm. A list of goals that I will work diligently to accomplish for approximately four days, before I completely fizzle out from the sheer exhaustion of it all, and probably never do again.

So here goes, folks! My hopes may not be high for my own success, but at least I'm making a list, right? That's a step in the right direction if I ever saw one!

1. Blog every day.
That's right. Every single day. Even if it's a little blurb. I think this goal is the most important, because it will help to keep my other goals on track. And remind me of my shame if when I fail. Shame is, after all, the driving force behind all success, right?


2. Abolish negative energy.
That's a big one. I've got a lot of pent-up negativity. Resentment towards various other women, bitterness toward the "unfairness" of my circumstances, as I like to think of it. Despite how overwhelmingly blessed I am in a hundred and one ways, I still find reasons to be negative and sad. So that's gotta change! I'm thinking I'll try meditation to start! (Good luck, Holly...)

3. Eat better Make healthy choices.
I started out with Eat Better, but the truth is I've got to make a lot of changes in the health department. With plans for baby #2 in the works it's time to start taking care of myself again. That means no aspartame, no caffeine, portion control, eating vegetables once in a while (if I have to...) and maybe a bit of exercise in there too. I'd like to start with maybe a half-hour walk every evening (if hubby will let me.) I also need to try and be more conscious of what I'm feeding my family. I guess...

4. Make a baby bucket list, and do everything on it.
Last time I got pregnant, I didn't realize all of the things I would suddenly have to do without for a really REALLY long time! So this time around, I need to make a list of the things I'd like to do one last time before baby's on board! And the clock is ticking, since according to my schedule, this upcoming Saturday may be Day #1 on the ovulation chart. (If we're as successful in our efforts as last time. Trying not to get my hopes up...)


5. Be happy.
Where I am, when I am, how I am. I need to stop worrying about where I'm not, all of the things I wish I had, or the ways I wish I was. I've got to find a way to be content. I'm hoping meditation helps with this, too. And maybe my evening walks. Alone time can go a long way when you're a mom!

6. Reconnect with God.
Sure we've been connecting on a semi-regular basis for a while, but I feel like a lot of my burdens would be a lot lighter if I had someone to lean on. And God's just the guy for the job. I want him to be an even bigger part of my family than he already is. I want to pray regularly, and maybe even crack open my bible once in a while.

I guess that's a good list for now! Shouldn't get too ambitious, don't want to set myself up for failure. Everything on the list seems achievable if I set my mind to it, and actually make an effort. And that's a lot to be said for me! I'm probably one of the laziest people I know.

What are some of the personal goals you've set for yourself? What are some of your past goals that you've definitely not come close to accomplishing? If you're a woman, I bet a lot of them have to do with getting in shape! We are such a strange animal...